“Look at everything always as though you were seeing it either for the first or last time: Thus is your time on earth filled with glory.”
― Betty Smith, A Tree Grows in Brooklyn

There are days when I get so consumed in my own worries that I hardly have time to notice certain subtleties in a day. I get so distracted trying to figure things out, trying to get things done, trying to get through.. so much so that the distance between myself and the present moment slowly grows..

The truth is life has a lot of precious little moments but they can be easy to miss. It’s very easy to become distant. To become occasional visitors of the present as though it were possible to live elsewhere. It’s silly when you think about it.. we live in this gorgeous house written this present moment boldly on the doormat but we constantly sit and look out the window hoping to anywhere else but here..

“If, then, I were asked for the most important advice I could give, that which I considered to be the most useful to the men of our century, I should simply say: in the name of God, stop a moment, cease your work, look around you.”
Leo Tolstoy, Essays, Letters and Miscellanies

I’ve been challenging myself to really be in the moment and that has meant asking myself what it really means. What being present and aware actually looks like. While I haven’t fully figured out the answers to these questions I have come to slowly realize a few things about the days when I am aware.. the days when I notice.

On the days I notice – colors are more vivid. The sky always seems a little more blue. I appreciate silly things like “aah, this toast and jam is just what I needed” or “Is it just me or is that leaf shaped perfectly”

On the days I notice I am aware the rarity of the moment. I appreciate that time cannot be recovered. Time is so precious.. time spent doing anything at all is very precious. The assumption is always that there will be another time. Another time to tell someone; another time to see them; another time to do that random thing I’ve been putting off for a month. Dr Seuss phrased the question best “how did it get so late so soon?”

On the days I notice I am free. The chaos life brings is not automatically removed but I feel free from it. It doesn’t consume me. It doesn’t dictate my thoughts. It doesn’t control my mood.. I am just.. free..

On the days I notice I am aware of who I am. I see myself a little more clearly. I don’t feel distant. On these days I fall in love with who I am. I laugh at my own thoughts and admire my own humor. I recognize myself in the calm beneath the storm.

My quest to have more and more days like this continues..